Friday, January 25, 2008

Seventeen Magazine



598 Cute New Looks, Get Irresistible Lips and Feeling Fat? Thats right folks, I am a subscriber to Seventeen magazine. Now, I must confess, I did not purposely subscribe to this fine publication. I was filling out an online form to enter some random drawing and then it just happened. Congratulations, you have just subscribed to Seventeen magazine. I remember mumbling to myself, "What? Oh no. How did this happen." Maybe its just me but I'm pretty sure that I don't fit within this magazines targeted demographic.

The magazine does have a few things going for it though. For on thing the cover is so bright that it could possibly cause seizures. It sure does smell a lot nicer than the last issue of Popular Mechanics, I believe its the Vera Wang Princess perfume. And, on top of all that, this issue also contains an offer for free undies, something I've never seen in competing publications like National Geographic.

Now I haven't read this magazine cover to cover as of yet but here are a few of the highlights. The cover says that there is an article inside called "Shocking Ways You Could Get Pregnant By Accident." Wow, I'm pretty sure that I could write that article. It would go something like this, "Having sex could get you pregnant, don't have sex your only seventeen." Ok so as it turns out that if I want perfect lips I need to buy some Victoria's Secret Beauty Rush Lip Gloss Cherry Bomb. I had no idea. I don't even if I could remember that whole name to ask for it. Did you know that lipstick comes is 6 different shapes, intriguing. Oh, and did you know that the truth about college guys is that they are more interesting, they booty call, and that they respect your brain. They respect your brain? That is news, when did that happen? Ok, so scarfs are in, Zac Efron is hot, sexy hair requires a curling iron, 81% of guys say they have never forgotten their girlfriends birthday, and its good to wear a different kind of bra on Saturday night than you wear on Sunday. Ok, I need to put this magazine away before someone at work sees me reading it. Note to self, cancel subscription to Seventeen magazine.

3 comments:

Ryan Detzel said...

Accidental subscription. Uh huh. And I don't like cooking and gardening.

carrie doan said...

Hey! I wanted to let you know that I have this great set of heels with your name written all over them. Plus, a matching camisole and blazer.

Good thing you wrote this blog, otherwise I would've never asked!

Ryan Allen Doan said...

you should hang on to it. I'm sure there is some good truth in there about something.