Friday, October 30, 2009

Video Tour of My Art

This video is about 3 minutes long and the quality doesn't do the art justice but it will give you an idea of what I have hanging. If you want better quality come over and see the stuff yourself.

Video Tour of my Art Gallery (hallway) from Dan Thoms on Vimeo.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

(don't) MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS!

It is important in life that you do not always mind your own business. After teaching 5th and 6th grade Thrive tonight, Myra one of my non-biological nieces, and I made a quick stop at the McDonald's drive true. Although it turned out to not be so quick. Side note: America is getting fat because they are going through the McDonald's drive through at 9:30 at night. There were about 5 cars in front of us and one behind us. As we sat there we could hear a voice, a loud angry voice coming from the car in the rear.
"Why are you f***ing sighing when I talk to you?"
"I was just sighing, that's all."
"What's f***ing wrong with you? Don't you sigh when I talk to you? Do you hear me? Don't you f***ing sigh."
And it went on and on it went. He yelled and cursed and yelled and cursed. Finally I was the next person in line. She was crying by now and he was still yelling. And that's when I made the decision to put my car in park, take off my seat belt, open my door, and walk back there. That's not something that I normally do nor is it something that I particular enjoy doing. It's a good way to get beat up.
I put my hand on his window and looked in. She was a mess. Her hair was covering her face and she was sobbing. He looked up at me and I said. "Is everything all right back here?" As he looked up at me and I could tell, he wanted to kill me. If we weren't in a public place he would have punched me right in the face. And let me tell you, that's a fight he would have won and not just because I'm a pacifist. The look in his eyes was pure evil.
"Mind your own business." he said.
"Is everyone all right back here?"
"Mind your own business." he said again through clenched teeth.
"Look, if I hear a women crying I make sure she is ok."
"I said mind your own business."
"If there's a women crying I make sure she's ok, are you cool with that? Ok. Ok."
As he glared at me I walked slowly back to my car. There was really nothing I could do. If a man will treat a women like that in public how does he treat here at home? And he did all this with their small child in the back seat. I guess at least she knows someone cares. As I pulled up to pay for my food I asked the cashier if I could pay for the peoples food behind me and he said sure. And then I left. That was it. If you think about it say a quick prayer for these folks, whoever they are. They need it.

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Your It

There are normally two reactions. There are the parents who see us and are scared for their kids safety and there are the parents who say, "just ask if you can play too." When the kids and I go to the park we play tag. And when we play tag we play hard. We run fast, jump far, go the wrong way on slides, fall down, get up and then run some more. I always come home with bruises but that's ok. Some things are more important than that ever looming to do list. Tag is one of them.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Random Stuff

- The guy in front of me at the dollar store paid with a $100 bill. Big ballin. He could have gotten 98 more items.

- I saw a little girl walking down the street in a Halloween costume today. At least I hope it was a Halloween costume because she had blood coming out of her mouth.

- Two of the girls in my 5th and 6th grade class wanted to fill their bowls up with water and drink like dogs. I said ok and they did.

- I went to a costume party dressed as my friend Adam. I didn't tell him that I was planning on doing this. He showed up at the party wearing the same shirt as me and a headband similar to mine. Coincidence, perhaps, strange, yes.

- I bought three cordless phones at the thrift store for $3. One needed a battery. So heres a math question for you. What is a better deal?
a) You can buy a new battery at Best Buy for $18 or b)you can buy a new phone with a battery in it for $16. If you chose a or b than you were wrong. The answer was c)buy the battery directly from Hong Kong on eBay for $3. And if you were wondering, but is it hand made the answer is why yes it is. The auction says it is a hand made battery.

- My microwave meal says the the internal temperature of my food should be 165 degrees as checked by a food thermometer. Using a food thermometer would kind of defeat the entire purpose of eating a microwave meal now wouldn't it?

- I slipped on something, fell in the grass and hurt myself. I thought that I was unlucky until I saw that there was a dead slug on my knee. That's one unlucky slug.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

What I've Learned (from teaching 5th and 6th grade)

Things I've learned from teaching 5th and 6th grade on Wednesday nights at the Vineyard Westside.

1) If you do a craft involving paint one of them will cover both of their hands with paint.
2) If one kid covers both hands with paint at least two more will follow suit.
3) If three kids cover their hands in paint one of them will take it to a new level and paint their face blue.
4) The three with paint on their hands will then smear it all the way down the handrails so that another 10 kids can also have painted hands.
5) No matter what you do one of them will say in a dramatic tone, "Why are you doing this to us."
6) Eight 5th and 6th graders can eat a combined 40 s'mores.
7) If you let them serve themselves ice-cream at least four of them will take approximately 25% of an entire container.
8) They will have licked half of it before you can tell them to put it back.
9) A 5th or 6th grader cannot eat that much ice-cream. Shoot, I can't eat that much ice-cream and I can eat.
10) If you do anything outside at night the neighbors pit bull will be annoyed as will the pit bulls owner.
11) A room full of 5th and 6th graders has more energy than the rest of the church combined.
12) The key to teaching 5th and 6th grade is to take lots of deep breaths.
13) One 5th grade girl can eat 10 s'mores. That's over an entire pack of Hersey miniatures.
14) If they had an anthem it would start with, "look what I can do." and end with, "mine is better."
15) Teaching this class is both mentally and physically exhausting.
16) I have one goal for this class. I want these kids to know that life is bigger than what they want.
17) This will be worth it.
18) This is worth it.

Where you wearing Pants?

Have you ever had a bad or confusing dream? I had one of those last night. Now this dream may not sound bad to you but it was to me. In my dream my brother told me that he no longer wanted to go to auctions. He said that it was a waist of time and wanted to focus only on high value items. From that point forward he would only be leaving left bids* at auctions. Now that is what you call a dumb idea. For one thing leaving bids is generally a bad idea. The live bidders always have the advantage and the auctioneer, if dishonest, can run your bid up to make you pay more. Plus, I enjoy live auctions. So I would just like to say to the dream version of my brother Phil, that was a dumb idea.

Speaking of dreams I came up with this theory. Have you ever had a memory that you weren't sure was real? Was it a dream or did that really happen? Well, next time that occurs ask yourself this simple question, "In this memory was I wearing pants." If the answer is no than it was probably a dream.


*Left Bid- A left bid is a bid written down and given to the auctioneer when a person cannot physically attend an auction. The auctioneer then is supposed to bid for you against the live bidders.