In my parents house there are 3 spots that have family pictures. There is the mantle place in the dinning room, the mantle place in the living room and on top of the piano. Upon close examination I have discovered that of the 17 pictures I am only in two. One of those pictures is about 10 years old and features me standing in a tree. The other is one of my sister Faith's wedding where I am one of the 8 people featured.
Apparently if you want to be in more than two pictures you need to be married. Even my brother in laws have equal booking to me. My fear is that when my Sister Grace has her baby, my parents first grand kid, I will no longer make the picture cut. One by one my pictures will be systematically replaced with that of a drooling baby. And with only two pictures that won't take very long. But that's ok, I have a plan. I have three plans.
PLAN A: Get a Kitten
In this plan I get a cute little kitten and take 100s of pictures of me holding it next to my face. If I take enough then perhaps one will be cute enough to at least make it on the piano. The real flaw with this plan is that I am deathly allergic to cats. With my face swelled, the pictures will most more than likely resemble that of Quasimoto eating a kitten. That's not too cute.
PLAN B: Get a Baby
In this plan I get a baby. Now the downfalls of this plan are quite obvious, I'm stuck with a kid for the next 18 years. With a little creative thinking this plan is however quite plausible. Instead of acquiring my own baby I will wait 7 months and borrow my sisters. Surely if I have a picture of me with my parents first grand kid that would be worthy of display. However, I have found that people usually prefer pictures of babies with their mothers. I'm not sure why that is but it seems the tradition.
PLAN C: Get Married
Um, yea.
Life Goals
- DanThoms
- ☺ Skydive
☺ Go skiing
☺ Buy a motorcycle
☺ Buy a house
□ Bungee-Jump
☺ Finish remodeling my bathroom
☺ Read 2 full books a year (yea I know, I don't read much)
□ Wife
□ Visit Africa
□ Visit South America
☺ Eat a new type of meat
☺ Create a youtube video with over 10,000 hits
□ Have kids
□ Have some of my comics or illustrations published
☺ Go rock climbing
☺ Increase giving
□ Read the New Testament twice this year
□ Pick up 20 more hitchhikers
□ Keep my car clean
□ Ride a bull
☺ Have party at my house
☺ Preach at my home church
□ Eat 2 pieces of fruit a week (hey don't judge me)
□ Break a world Record
□ Grill out more often
□ Be in a movie
☺ Plant a garden
□ Use my reusable shopping bag more often
□ Ride a 4-wheeler
☺ Do the Polar bear plunge
□ See the Indian mounds
☺ Bring 12 new people into my church this year
☺ Stop making fun of the French
□ Ride and Ostrich
□ Challenge an Olympic athlete to a game of Paper Rock Scissors
2 comments:
You can borrow my kitties anytime you need cute pictures with animals...Also, ask the Woodburns if you can borrow Reagan for a few pictures - then you won't have to wait 7 months... :)
Plan B or Plan C will work. Your parents house will be plastered with pictures of their grandbaby and you should be able to work your way into at least a few of them. And Plan C? It's not "Um, yea." It's "HELL YES!" Get working on that!
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