Wednesday, October 28, 2009


It is important in life that you do not always mind your own business. After teaching 5th and 6th grade Thrive tonight, Myra one of my non-biological nieces, and I made a quick stop at the McDonald's drive true. Although it turned out to not be so quick. Side note: America is getting fat because they are going through the McDonald's drive through at 9:30 at night. There were about 5 cars in front of us and one behind us. As we sat there we could hear a voice, a loud angry voice coming from the car in the rear.
"Why are you f***ing sighing when I talk to you?"
"I was just sighing, that's all."
"What's f***ing wrong with you? Don't you sigh when I talk to you? Do you hear me? Don't you f***ing sigh."
And it went on and on it went. He yelled and cursed and yelled and cursed. Finally I was the next person in line. She was crying by now and he was still yelling. And that's when I made the decision to put my car in park, take off my seat belt, open my door, and walk back there. That's not something that I normally do nor is it something that I particular enjoy doing. It's a good way to get beat up.
I put my hand on his window and looked in. She was a mess. Her hair was covering her face and she was sobbing. He looked up at me and I said. "Is everything all right back here?" As he looked up at me and I could tell, he wanted to kill me. If we weren't in a public place he would have punched me right in the face. And let me tell you, that's a fight he would have won and not just because I'm a pacifist. The look in his eyes was pure evil.
"Mind your own business." he said.
"Is everyone all right back here?"
"Mind your own business." he said again through clenched teeth.
"Look, if I hear a women crying I make sure she is ok."
"I said mind your own business."
"If there's a women crying I make sure she's ok, are you cool with that? Ok. Ok."
As he glared at me I walked slowly back to my car. There was really nothing I could do. If a man will treat a women like that in public how does he treat here at home? And he did all this with their small child in the back seat. I guess at least she knows someone cares. As I pulled up to pay for my food I asked the cashier if I could pay for the peoples food behind me and he said sure. And then I left. That was it. If you think about it say a quick prayer for these folks, whoever they are. They need it.


Chris said...

I can't stand that. I hate the f-bomb period, but couple that with kids?????? No wonder kids are growing up with no respect. And it blows me away that this guy wasn't even a little embarrassed. What's this world coming to????

Not Too Old said...

I'm glad you did it. I'll pray for them and for YOU. It's funny how I usually don't have enough courage to confront a man when he's abusing a woman, but when it's anyone with a child I'll do something similar. I hope that your action made her realize there was at least one person in the world that thought what was happening was wrong.

Shelly said...

That was an awesome thing to do. Good for you.

Kelly said...

Good job dan. I pray that woman gets herself and her child(ren) out of that situation and that he can get some help.

Francy said...

I agree with Kelly! Also, I think what you did also sets a great example for Myra. You showed her that for a man to behave like that toward a woman is unacceptable and that a real man isn't afraid to stand up and say so. You're awesome Dan! By the way, I'm curious what Myra's reaction to the whole situation was.

melanie said...

You did a good thing, Mr. Thoms.
Well done.
I haven't been able to get this woman out of my mind today.

Helen Ann said...

You're a good man, Dan Thoms.

Reverb said...

And that's how you step up to be a man. Well done. If you would have gotten beat up, at the very worst she would have seen the dirtbag she was with and he would have eventually felt bad for bludgeoning some hippie that bought their lunch.

At best he might just slow down to realize that he is indeed a dirtbag, and make a change.

And what does the Lord require of you? That you act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with your God. - Micah 6:8

photogr said...

Certainly a good jesture on your part. Good that you weren't hurt.

Joy said...

I think it's great that you wanted to help, but how much worse is it gonna be after? Most likely you just pissed him off more, and since he couldn't take it out on you he'll take it out on her.

DanThoms said...

The thing is it's already worse for her. Rather it was that night or the next night, abusers abuse. I've talked to a few women who have been in similar situations and they have consistently told me that they wished that someone would have stepped in and said something. The important thing is that she knows that the way she is being treated isn't right and that she does matter. A lot of women don't fully realize that.