Wednesday, December 3, 2008

My Disabilty


They say real men don't cry. Who are these "they"? "They" are jerks. I don't cry. It's a defective tear gland. I have overly moist eyes. Why just today they become overly moist when listening to a news story about the terrorism in India. And tonight while watching millionaires give people checks for $100,000 my eyes experienced an excess amount of water. I may have to see a doctor to figure out why my eyes are secreting salt water. My disorder seems to be triggered by any number of things. Sometimes its a news story, a reality show, a commercial, a book, and the list goes on. WemMD.com has proven to be useless in the analysis of my unmanly disability. Oh why me? Why must I suffer like this?

10 comments:

Paul said...

I wish more people would suffer from this disability. But those that don't suffer from your disorder generally suffer from a different disorder. Numbness.

Reverb said...

Why don't you cry about it you wuss.

melanie said...

I'm all for offering to help you, but that diagram of the eye is making me too nauseus to be of service.

Anonymous said...

Seriously, it's not your eye Dan...it's your heart...you have one! Yea!!!

Michael Joseph Sharp said...

Dan, if I told you that I thought about posting (on my blog) something about why people cry with tears a few weeks ago, ... this before reading your post here, ...would you think I was crazy or making it up? Is it just another coincidence? Flipping weird!

I was going to ask what tears are for? I know that when stuff gets in your eye, then tears flush it out. But what is the *medical* reason for tears when one is sad or happy? I mean what purpose do tears serve? If there is nothing in one's eye, ... and one is just sad or happy, ... then what is the biological need for tears? Sometimes I get "worked up" during the celebration music at church, and tears come. Or sometimes when watching a movie it happens. But why? What is the purpose of tears when you don't need your eyes flushed?

I thought about posting this, ... and didn't, ... and then you give a perfect opportunity to talk about it anyway.

Since coming to the VWS, some of the strangest stuff has happened. Maybe I'm looking into it (no pun intended) a little too much.

DanThoms said...

Perhaps not a coincidence. I've never thought about it that way. What purpose do tear serve. According to my online research emotional tears are a human thing and serve no physical purpose. Strange.

Michael Joseph Sharp said...

Ya know, with that said, maybe I will post the question on my blog after all.

Certainly someone must know something, right?

MaLady said...

lol Reverb!

ooh ooh ooh, I know something - sad tears include toxins that aren't present in tears of happiness or tears of eye irritation. Now, I wonder if those toxins are already present or toxins produced by whatever stress also triggered the sad tears.

I used to have that disease of numbness - for a very long time - sometimes now I cry and I love it. I do feel "clean" and "free" afterwards, like a rain that washed dirt away or something.

Anonymous said...

It reminds me of when Jerry is not sure of the salty discharge coming from his eye...

elektra said...

awww i wish more people suffered (?) from this disorder too...